his food it is stolen from him if he doesn't eat his rations the moment he gets them, they 'll be taken away in devilment, and often kept in earnest. If he lies down to sleep, trains of powder are made to his nose and set fire to; his feet are tied together; his brushes, comb, button-stick, and almost everything are stolen from him, and he is punished for losing them. If he does try to clean his lock (and he is a very bad hand at it, poor fellow), some of them will rust it again with a wet sponge. Besides, the creature is broken-hearted with extra drills. It was a most unfortunate thing to bring him out to this country."

While those remarks were being made, John stood silent in the midst, leaning on his musket. To the mocking question of "Would you like a piece of your mother's bacon, John ? he looked sadder than usual, and struggled to withhold a tear. The Philosopher asked him if he was hungry; if they had stolen his rations; for if so, he (the Philosopher) would spare him some when the guard had mounted. John replied, "No, I've no hunger; I'll never be hungry again; but if my mother's bacon were here, you would get all plenty of it, and be all welcome, even the worst of ye; and that is what vexes me, to think we have so much at home, that you would get all enough of, without needing to take my mouthful from me."

Poor fellow!" said one of the listeners. "Cheer up your heart, John; you'll get over it all, my boy," said another.

"I'll get over it sooner than you think," replied John.

Sound the guard-call, bugler-quick about it! was the command of the sergeant-major, who now

came tramping along the gallery in consequential authority to mount the guard.

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The call was sounded; the men fell in, dressed, from the right; came up a little in the centre; back a little on the left; got the words "steady; eyes front;""fix bayonets;" "shoulder arms; rear rank take open order;" and "march; which last word meant that the rear-rank would step back one pace to make room for the inspection. The next proceeding was open;-ah, what are you about there? wait till you hear the word pans before you open. As you were! you stupid, JohnJohn what's your name-you are always too quick or too slow. Bring up your hands at the word open, and throw the pan up at the word pans; and do it altogether, or I shall try what pack-drill will do for some of you. Open pans! slope

arms!

་་

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Now I've come this length, and have not had to find fault with anyone but you-you, you stupid obstinate dirty scoundrel ! What do you mean, Sir? What do you mean by turning out with that rust in your pan?

"I only came off guard yesterday; and I have been at pack-drill ever since.'

Silence, Sir, don't answer me! Why is the rust on your lock? Why are your buttons not cleaned? Why is your pouch not polished? Keep you heels close, sir; and hold up your head! Don't look at your lock now-you should have looked at it before you came here.'

To all this, and much more, John said not a word, save the attempt to explain, that he had been so constantly at punishment-drill, that he had no time; but such an excuse as that is never admitted.

When the order, "examine arms," was given, which is to draw the ramrod, give it a ring into the barrel, catch it as it springs out, and lay it across the muzzle, that it may show whether any rust is inside; the ramrod of Simple John was heard to give a stifled sound.

Spring your ramrod again, Sir!" said the sergeant-major. It was done. "Why, your musket is loaded! How is that? Give it to me."

It was loaded sure enough; and when the charge was drawn it was found to be well loaded with two bullets. On closer examination it was seen also that the pan had recently had priming in it. The sergeant-major ordered another man to be furnished by the company that John belonged to, and the latter was sent in to sponge his musket, afterwards to go to punishment-drill. Another man would have got the guard-house; but John escaped that, by the supposition that someone had done it in mischief.

He got his pieces of rags to work, and with tedious awkwardness made an effort to shine. Whether anyone took particular notice of him is uncertain. Several alleged afterwards that he did not sponge his barrel at all; but that, instead, he put another cartridge into it. Subsequent events would prove that this allegation was true, though it is probable that no one saw him, else they would have hindered or reported the circumstance.

During the afternoon, while John groaned and almost sunk under the load of accoutrements and knapsack, for though his kit of necessaries had been lessened by the light fingers of some of his comrades, no light knapsack was allowed at punishment-drill,

if there was nothing else, it was packed with stones— when he had trotted at double quick for hours together under this infliction, and when the other defaulters were allowed to go into barracks, the sergeant-major called him from among them, and ordered him to be kept an hour longer.

send

"Orderly," said said the sergeant-major, Corporal Smith here to drill this fellow, be quick about it, now."

"Move on, you blockhead!" addressing Simple John. "Up your head, straighten those knees, double; faster, faster, Sir; halt! If you would devote one-tenth of the labour to cleaning yourself and accoutrements, that you are obliged to perform at punishment-drill, you would never be here; but you won't, you are so obstinate. Now, though I should drill the very life out of you, I'll overcome that sulkiness; so you had better make up your mind to pay some attention to your instructions. Were I to report you to the commanding officer you would be flogged-flogged, Sir-flogged; but I hate flogging, and so does the adjutant, else you and many more would be reported when you are

not.'

Flog me, sergeant-major, if you please, it would be mercy to this; it would soon be over, and I would know what it was for; but this suffering has no end, and I do not know what it is for. Let me sit down, Sir, if you please, I am not able to stand."

"Sit down, indeed! Sit down at punishment-drill! that would be punishment! No, Sir, you shall not sit down, nor halt even. I shall make Corporal Smith double you in that ploughed field for an hour without a moment's halt."

Corporal Smith not yet having come, the sergeantmajor kept John on the move himself, muttering now and then to the effect, that "The colonel looks to me for all the men being perfect in exercise and cleanliness, and they shall be made perfect. I've resolved on it; I don't like to see them flogged, but they shall have punishments that will vex them

And then he vociferated from time to time, "Double, you lazy rascal! Why do you halt? No shifting of your musket from one shoulder to the other; keep your right hand down; no hitching up of your knapsack that way; keep your elbows close to your side; your musket at the carry ; upright, sir; not sloped that way.

Sergeant-major, for the love of God let ne sit down-my back is breaking-I'll sink."

Silence, Sir; not a word; move on-quickquicker!"

In such a style as this was Simple John trotted about in a ploughed field, with the sixty rounds of ammunition dangling at his hip, for he had his full complement in his pouch; it was a spare round which was then in his musket; and the weighty knapsack, stone-stuffed, tearing his shoulders from their sockets; his knee-joints bending-poor fellow, they were not very nicely formed by nature, and their deformity was added to now by outrageous punishment; his neck was breaking in straightened stiffness, his arms and fingers cramped, and his head pained, his poor simple brains racked even to despair, and that by a punishment which is the commonest of all in the army, and has nothing said about it out of the army.

I, Paul Swanston, author of my own memoirs,