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vanished like her face; and the innocence of of having been spent in dreaming, would proba. childhood shall have become efficed by the stern bly have been occupied in sight-seeing. But experience of maturer life; in the hour of danger would this have been better? Should I have and temptation, of disappointment and sorrow, made a wiser, or a happier man? Doubtless I the memory of that hour when he first beheld should have known more of the outward world. the form and face of her he loved more than all But material objects would then have had a less things else, shall come to gladden his heart with dreamy and poetic influence. The mountain 2 joy unspeakable. In his heart of hearts, the would have been a simple mountain to me, and image of his mother will be the object of his the ocean--ocean; the landscape would simply fond idolatry. He will adorn it with all his fond- have presented me with a number of beautiful est thoughts and brightest conceptions of good- images. But as it was, each object which could ness, truth and beauty.

not be measured by my hands, was a mystery

something to dream about. I remember, too, Her tender love through his long dark night,

(I wish I did not,) that I came to be proud of Shall be his joy, his life and light.

that misfortune which distinguished me from The loss of any faculty of mind or body, is a

my fellows. There was a kind of satisfaction, calamity, not because, as it generally is suppos

not very bealthy, certainly, which I derived in ed, it cuts one off from any one particular enjoy

hearing the change of voice when those I loved ment, or prevents the mind from being harmo

turned from speaking of others to speak of me. niously developed; but rather and most of all,

The pride and satisfaction, the kind of joyous because it tends to concentrate all thought and

tone with which my mother spoke of her chilreflection upon self. I begin to discover in this

dren, was changed to a plaintive moan, as she an explanation of much of my life that seemed

spoke of him who could never more see her face. before an enigma. I am pledged to conceal no

And this to me was a kind of compensation for thing. Therefore I confess, though with shame,

the loss of the beautiful. When I went forth in that most of my existence has passed away con

the world, I received the same consideration; troled by selfishness and self-love. Nor am I

from every one came the same sad tones; the consoled that my error is also the mistake which

same mournful words. I have since wondered has embittered the life of most of my fellows.

why they did not congeal in my heart—"Poor What is that disparity that exists between me

boy! he is blind.” Long days I would sit beand the great and good of every age? It is sim

neath the shady tree and inhale the perfume of ply-I admire in them the absence of that self

the flowers, and listen to the music of the birds, love which has enslaved me. When I think

or wander by the sea-side listening to the waves with what eagerness I have received the pity

as they dashed against the shore, wondering all and commiseration which my misfortune has

the while with myself, what else there could be excited, and how little sympathy I have felt for

in nature which I could not enjoy-I who so exthe misery and sufferings of others, my little life

cited the pity of others. In those bright days, seems too poor and mean for a history, and I

(for bright they were, though unblest by sunbegin almost to regret the task I have underta. / light,) a serene and holy joy pervaded my inken. But will not this selfishness, this intense

most being. Sometimes I thought of the disegotism, in which I have been so long engul.

tant stars not as I now think of them, huge phed, lead to some great and general end? We

planets revolving upon their axis or around their common centre, but bright mansions in the sky

-- blest homes of those too pure to dwell on A few words are sufficient to relate the inci.

earth. But there came a change. Selfishness dents of my earlier life. Much undoubtedly that and change are the two great causes of our misbelongs not to my general life, but which was

ery. I passed from the innocence of childhood the peculiar property of childhood, if I may so

to whai has been fitly enough called " speak, has passed away with it. Some few

period." The first years of our life we retain things, however, belonging to the general ac

upon our souls a faint impress of heaven's innocount, seem worthy of note. I have sometimes

cence. But the serpent lorks in our Eden, and been puzzled for an answer when I have asked

soon the forbidden fruit tempts us onward. The myself the question, what would have been my

senses gradually succeed in effacing all our condition, if my life had been other than what

bright reminiscences of a purer and a higher it has been? The days of my childhood instead

state. Finally, they succeed in creating a want

shall see.

the savage

they never can satisfy, and drive us forth in pur. now that the faith of ibe heart was gone, to the suit of knowledge. The silent sympathy which dull monotony of law and utility. But there is existed between us and all created things, has a higher culture than that hard and dry, and we vanished, and we realize that we are in a world may add, superficial knowledge, which substiwhich we must either conquer, or where we stutes appearance for reality, law for God, and must be conquered. In that internediate state, the deductions of the mind for the intuitions of the senses and the intellect sway our actions. the soul. Indeed a man may be said not to be i The light of our intuitions becomes clouded. educated until having experimented with his Instead of simple confidence, we have the pain- senses, he has come to doubt their validity. It ful consciousness of ignorance. God, who to is this noble doubt which turns the proud pethe little child is in every leaf of the grove, in dant, brimful of scientific conceit, afier many every ripple of the stream--whose greatness is wanderings, to the path which, if he pursues reflected from whatever is grand—whose good- with faithfulness, shall conduct him to the peace ness smiles in whatever is beautiful, becomes, and innocence which sympathy with nature and in this second state, a distant lawgiver ; no communion with God can alone impart. The longer is He the kind Father seen in sunshine noblest idealism is perfectly compatible with and shower, but a severe Governor, dwelling in the simple confidence which the child reposes in some distant part of the universe controlling all the senses; and he, to whoin the real is the things by inexorable laws.

ideal, to whom the material world is but the reAnother characteristic of this savage transi- flection of the soul, has obtained only from phition state, is seen in the aversion we manifest losophy what was always his faith before the for the simple ideas and pure pleasures of our senses taught him to doubt. I know, in this former state. Having parted with our faith, we age of ours, where the maxims of utility and come under the dominion of our will. Having expediency, constitute so much of our ethics and lost our love, we seek only for power. Happy our religion, the suggestion of the idealist-that he who passing this ordeal of his life, can, by the outward is the leeting and the transitory, the means of culture, and by something better, that the soul is the only living reality, will ex. have restored to birn, after many days and many cite pity and contempt. It is worthy of remark tears, the serene joy and beautiful faith of his that the religious man, whether educated or noi, childhood. Moralists talk to us of heroic virtue, is an idealist. And all religious books which but who that can represent to himself what he the world has produced, teach this great truth, was when a child, would place in comparison its

that “the things that are seen are temporal; simple goodness with that sorrowful experience the things that are not seen are eternal.” But of after years which is but the poor reward, or not to pursue this subject farther, we will mere. rather miserable result of a thousand conflicts ly remark, that the spiritualist or idealist pos. with the world, the flesh, and the devil ?

sesses over him whose existence is absorbed in Education is the only solace of our ignorance. the world of senses, an advantage,which addres. But can the knowledge we acquire from the ses itself to his selfishness, and may furnish a schools compensate and console us for the loss consideration to the sensualist to bestow upon of that which makes knowledge necessary ? spiritualism something more than a sveer. Ideal. Certainly I thought not, as I returned to the ism overcomes the sear of death by annihilating home of my childhood after many years absence. it. For the soul, there is but one life--one reThe divine element that pervaded all nature, ality, that which changes is always death. was gone. The tree beneath whose shade I had I have thus endeavored to develope by refect. spent so many happy hours, listening to the ing upon my life certain principles rather than waving of its branches as it responded to the to narrate particular and unimportant events. musie of the murmuring stream, was no longer But as yet I had not obtained the object of my a mystery, but something which my knowledge search. I was still compelled to ask myself the enabled me to ealculate the number of inches it question, what means it? Whither does it tend ? contained, and the uses to which it might be Where is the consolation ? My evil genius reapplied. The ocean's roar was no longer the plied, “For you, O man, there is no consolavoice of God, but a natural phenomenon. What- tion ; life is but a dream, and man an enigma ;" ever once transcended the limited range of my

and I said in a kind of sorrowful despair, it canfaculties, whatever was beautiful or mysterious,

not be that all this we call life, is causeless and was educed by the little knowledge of my brain

aimless; it cannot be, that for those who strive

and weep, there is no consolation ; and then my

and wildest devotion, became my higher and good genius replied, “ Hope on, and the conso.

better self. lations will come; for God is the author of all." This, then, is the law of our existenceAnd then I heard a voice whose music stole up

the heart from loving itself-from a pure sponon the heart like visions of memory, like those taneous impulse, shall go on expanding until low, soft tones which had lulled me to sleep in

it comprehendeth the universe. I see, then, the days of my infancy-'twas the voice of my wherefore I was made-that I might love and mother;—and she said, “For these many years

be loved. Love then is the source, the esI have witnessed your wanderings, and I ain sence, and terminus of all things. I will then now commissioned to bear to you that for which open my heart and receive all the influences thou yearnest. Thou wouldst know the secret from around and above. Nothing so insignifiof life-that which can explain its meaning and cant but shall share my regard. I have now at impart consolation. Know then that in forget- last found the secret I have so longed for. fulness of self is the blessedness of life.”

Though the beautiful in earth and be still The voice ceased, and I fell into a profound hid from my view; though the human face, rareverie. I said--as the light broke upon my

diant with beauty, be but a blank to me, yet soul-this then is the will of Heaven, that the will I rejoice that the earth and sky, with their love with which we have encircled ourselves, myriad objects of beauty and sublimity, delight should encircle the universe. When a truth the eye and gladden the heart of the millions of first dawns upon the mind, how much that be- earth's children. In rejoicing at my brother's fore that was darkness becomes luminous! And blessedness, I will bury in forgetfulness my own thus I saw this truth reflected from the life of selfish sorrow. There is a deeper beauty than every great and good man; and more especially that which the sunlight reveals in this all-perfrom that Perfect Life which has been and will vading, all-absorbing love. Sometimes, perhaps, continue to be forever the consolation and the there will steal over me a yearning for some seljoy of the ages.

fish delight, but it shall be only as a message Moreover when I consider that period of my from the dark past to urge me on to the bright life, when standing upon the verge of manhood future. I felt a want, a kind of new born longing for Here then I have at length reached the object sympathy and communion with something I of my search ; after long groping in the dark, knew not what,--that bright but troubled dream I have discovered the ineaning of my life. in which was blended all the aspirations of the Henceforth, I will think and talk no more of past with all the hopes of the future,—that myself. I am indeed no longer an individual, dreary sense of loneliness which made the world but a part of the great whole. My future is seem a desert;-strange that then I should not linked with the destiny of the universe. Conhave discovered the impotency of self adoration. sciousness of identity is evermore blended with But I welcomed to my heart the image that

Where the smile of peace and joy consoled me, and incorporated it with myself. dwelleth, there will be my blessedness. So long It was the embodiment of all my yearnings. as the heart of one of earth's children shall pulIt was the bright and glorious creation of all my sate with sorrow, I must weep. fond fancies. It was not the beauty of form and Having ascertained the ultimate purpose of face that smote my heart. It was the divine my being, I now comprehend the life of my race, idea-the lis breathing, incarnate spirit since both are identical. The world is still submade manifest to me, not through the beaming jected to the law of self. Love is yet but the countenance and sparkling eyes, but by the low substance of our dreams. Still we must toil on. tremulous voice ;-that voice by day and night, The day of rejoicing will come to the earth, and in joy or in sorrow, is everinore the light of my consolation unspeakable to the sad and sorrowexistence. I narvel, now that years have pas- ing heart of humanity. God shall once more sed away, why it was that one with so many of dwell with his children. Eden shall be no longer the attributes of an angel, and so few of the a tale of the past. Love incarnate shall no frailties of a mortal, should not have taught me longer be a mystery. They will the home of huthe impotency of self, and thesupreme blessedness manity be the abode of angels; and Heaven shall of disinterested love. But whatever the human be established upon the earth. And then again heart adores, it appropriates. So that which “the morning stars shall sing together, and all attracted in early manhood my heart's fondest I the sons of God shout for joy."

the race.

B. B. BOWEN.

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dale ;

And my pleased Muse remembers to the last

Her youth to train to manly moods and might, What griefs were soothed where Felix Denda And led their fleet steps o'er the hills of light.

passed ; And how the sons of want from day to day,

And there were more the mindful Muse would Like bleating lambs flocked crowding in his way.

sing, So mild his eye, so gentle was his move,

And there were fond enchantments she would The birds lit on him warbling back his love ;

fling The young rose reverent when he entered in ;

Around the hearts that hear the jocund song The old pursued him one more smile to win ; Whose notes must change to wailing wo ere long. The lame and dumb took hope and joy intense,

But this fine group of nobles must suffice And blind men blest him for beneficence.

To show what people grace our paradise ;

And how their comely being first began ; And may we not thy mournful name employ, And how their race for years in rapture ran ; Pride of Calanda, Alma Elmenoy ?

While she a scene suburban adds to this, Nor sing the sadness of thy nuptial morn ? And paints the monarch of its black abyss. Nor name the hearts that in thy death were torn? Bright, blooming cherub' maiden ! from thy Beyond the lawns that spread their lustrous charms

blooms Taste drank new zest, and Art drew fairer forms; Around Calanda, hiding all her glooms ; And hadst thou rambled in Crotona's grove, Beyond the woods, and o'er sour wet swale When Zeuxis painted his proud queen of love,

That stretched out northward from the hamlet From thee he would have drawn each full-blown air,

Hedged with drear cypress and o'erhung with And ta'en no tribute from the five less fair.

clouds

That wrapped the glowing sky in ghastly shrouds; And while fresh tears for absent Alma flow,

Veiled from each prying gaze that would explore The Muse's memory rises to a glow,

Its lurid moorlands from the murky shore ; Recalling scenes, and acts, and joys that wave

A cavern yawned, and forth with yell and frown The crowns of blessing Father Gilroy gave. Loosed a mad monster on the lovely town. He from his youth with sweet and gracious heart Held in Calanda the kind Pastor's part ;

A Fiend he was of medley form and mien, And while age gave him hoary looks to wear, Like, and unlike ill creatures they had seen. And crowned his honors with the milk-white His round, wild head the tiger seemed to tell ;

His face was wan, mysterious and fell ; His hale and buoyant soul grew young and bright His frosty eyes were fixed and gave a glance In a dear people's fondness and delight.

That held one shuddering in a frigid trance,

And froze the heart and curdled up the blood ; He reigned a patriarch over patriarchs old, He had the swine's nose, rimmed, and smeared And gave them counsels, and their griefs con

with mud ; soled ;

His mouth of moans, and laughs, and growls and He walked congenial with the ripening race ;

jeers, And called fresh fires of gladness to their face ;

Cut like a horse-bell, opened to his ears.
He loosed his heart in childhood's beating breast,
And relished all its frolic with a zest ;

In lazy moods, while breathing blight and gall, He had a blessing and a boon for all,

He seemed upon a thousand legs to crawl ; And joyed to bind them in love's genial thrall, And sometimes to inflame their fear and dread And teach their souls to rise in royal sway

He came on wings from his brown shoulders And bring the rampant senses to obey.

spread ;

But when he issued on his usual round Reared by sage Gilroy to a knightly life,

His fleet length floated snake-like on the ground. The valiant Trexlar through invasions rife, Broad scales in scallops like a bat’s dull wing, Led forth Calanda's chivalry, and bled,

Hard as behemoth's, cased the Dragon-King ; To save her green lawns from the foeman's tread.

And from his tongue when kindled in his ire, And while despoilers held the war away,

He shot keen fangs and spit forth arrowy fire. And maiden Peace maintained her placid sway, As was her wont through years of proud repose ;

Calanda's people from the primal hour Trexlar, the prompt, free, glorious gallant, chose

Had seen the grim dusk o'er his dungeon lower ;

hair ;

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