To God, to Prince, Wife, kindred, friend, the poor,

In zeal, faith, love, blood, amity, and store,
He hath so lived, and so deceased, lies here.

IN THE CHURCH OF ST. GREGORY, SUDBury.
Viator, mirum referam.

Quo die efflavit animam Thos. Carter, prædictus,
Acus foramen transivit Camelus Sudburiensis.
Vade, et si dives sis, tu fac similiter.

Vale.

(Traveller, I will relate a prodigy. On the day whereon the aforesaid Thos. Carter breathed out his soul, a Sudbury camel passed through the eye of a needle. Go, and if thou art wealthy, do thou likewise. Fare

well.

IN LLANBEBLIG, CARNARVONSHIRE.

Of such is the Kingdom of Heaven.

Here lie the remains of Thomas Chambers,
Dancing Master;

Whose genteel address and assiduity
in Teaching

Recommended him to all that had the
Pleasure of his acquaintance.

ON AN INFIDEL.

From the Latin.

Beneath this stone the mouldering relics lie
Of one to whom Religion spoke in vain;

He lived as though he never were to die,

And died as though he ne'er should live again.

PROPOSED BY A FRENCH THEOLOGIAN FOR VOLTAIRE.

In poesi magnus,

In historia parvus,

In philosophia minimus,

In religione nullus.

Hume, the classic historian of England, denied the existence of matter, and held that the whole congeries of material things are but impressions and ideas in the mind, distinguishing an impression from an idea by its stronger effect on the thinking faculty. Dr. Beattie sufficiently exposed the absurdity; but his famous essay has nothing more pointed than the witty epitaph that somebody wrote on the marble shaft that stands over the infidel's grave:

Beneath this circular idea, vulgarly called tomb,
Impressions and ideas rest, which constituted Hume.

ON TOM PAINE.

Tom Paine for the Devil is surely a match.

In leaving old England he cheated Jack Ketch;

In France (the first time such a thing had been seen)

He cheated the watchful and sharp guillotine;

And at last, to the sorrow of all the beholders,

He marched out of life with his head on his shoulders.

EARTH TO EARTH.

Few persons have met with the following poem, now nearly four centuries old; but many will recognise in some of the stanzas, particularly the first, four and the last four, the source of familiar monumental inscriptions. The antiquary can refer to many a dilapidated stone on which these quaint old lines can yet be traced.

Vado mori Rex sum, quid honor quid gloria mundi,

Est vita mors hominum regia-vado mori.

Vado mori miles victo certamine belli,

Mortem non didici vincere vado mori.

Vado mori medicus, medicamine non relevandus,
Quicquid agunt medici respuo vado mori,

Vado mori logicus, aliis concludere novi,

Concludit breviter mors in vado mori.

Earth out of earth is worldly wrought;

Earth hath gotten upon earth a dignity of nought;
Earth upon earth has set all his thought,

How that earth upon earth might be high brought.

Earth upon earth would be a king,

But how that earth shall to earth he thinketh no thing;

When earth biddeth earth his rents home bring,

Then shall earth from earth have a hard parting.

Earth upon earth winneth castles and towers,
Then saith earth unto earth this is all ours;

But when earth upon earth has builded his bowers,
Then shall earth upon earth suffer hard showers.

Earth upon earth hath wealth upon mould;
Earth goeth upon earth glittering all in gold,

Like as he unto earth never turn should;

And yet shall earth unto earth sooner than he would.

Why that earth loveth earth wonder I think,

Or why that earth will for earth sweat and swink.

For when earth upon earth is brought within the brink,
Then shall earth for earth suffer a foul stink.

As earth upon earth were the worthies nine,

And as earth upon earth in honor did shine;

But earth list not to know how they should incline,

And their gowns laid in the earth when death hath made his fine.

As earth upon earth full worthy was Joshua,

David, and worthy King Judas Maccabee,

They were but earth none of them three;

And so from earth unto earth they left their dignity.

Alisander was but earth that all the world wan,

And Hector upon earth was held a worthy man,

And Julius Cæsar, that the Empire first began;
And now as earth within earth they lie pale and wan.

Arthur was but earth for all his renown,

No more was King Charles nor Godfrey of Boulogne;
But now earth hath turned their nobleness upside down,
And thus earth goeth to earth by short conclusion.

Whoso reckons also of William Conqueror,
King Henry the First that was of knighthood flower,
Earth hath closed them full straitly in his bower,-
So the end of worthiness,-here is no more succor.

Now ye that live upon earth, both young and old,
Think how ye shall to earth, be ye never so bold;
Ye be unsiker, whether it be in heat or cold,
Like as your brethren did before, as I have told.

Now ye folks that be here ye may not long endure,
But that ye shall turn to earth I do you ensure;
And if ye list of the truth to see a plain figure,
Go to St. Paul's and see the portraiture.

All is earth and shall to earth as it sheweth there,
Therefore ere dreadful death with his dart you dare,
And for to turn into earth no man shall it forbear,
Wisely purvey you before, and thereof have no fear.

Now sith by death we shall all pass, it is to us certain,
For of earth we come all, and to the earth shall turn again;
Therefore to strive or grudge it were but vain,

For all is earth and shall be earth,-nothing more certain.

Now earth upon earth consider thou may
How earth cometh to earth naked alway,

Why should earth upon earth go stout alway,

Since earth out of earth shall pass in poor array?

I counsel you upon earth that wickedly have wrought,

That earth out of earth to bliss may be brought.

BYRON'S INSCRIPTION ON THE MONUMENT OF HIS DOG.

Near this spot

Are deposited the remains of one

Who possessed beauty without vanity,

Strength without insolence,

Courage without ferocity,

And all the virtues of man without his vices.

This praise, which would be unmeaning flattery
If inscribed over human ashes,

Is but a just tribute to the memory of
Boatswain, a dog,

Who was born at Newfoundland, May, 1803,
And died at Newstead Abbey, Nov. 18, 1808.

Inscriptions.

TAVERN-SIGNS.

I'm amazed at the signs
As I pass through the town,
To see the odd mixture,-

A magpye and crown,
The whale and the crow,
The razor and hen,

The leg and seven stars,

The axe and the bottle,

The tun and the lute,

The eagle and child,

The shovel and boot.-British Apollo, 1710.

THE absurdities which tavern-signs present are often curious enough, but may in general be traced to that inveterate propensity which the vulgar of all countries have, to make havoc with every thing in the shape of a proper name. What a magpie could have to do with a crown, or a whale with a crow, or a hen with a razor, it is as difficult to conjecture as to trace the corruption of language in which the connection more probably originated. The sign of the leg and the seven stars was merely an orthographical deviation from the league and seven stars, or seven united provinces; and the axe and bottle was, doubtless, a transposition of the battle-axe, a most appropriate sign for warlike times. The tun and lute formed suitable emblems enough of the pleasures of wine and music. The eagle and child, too, had meaning, though no application; but when we come to the shovel and boot, nonsense again triumphs, and it is in vain that we look for any rational explanation of the affinity. The Swan-with-two-necks has long been an object of mystery to the curious. This mystery is solved by the alteration of a single letter. The sign, as it originally stood, was the swan with two nicks; the meaning of which we find thus explained in a communication made by the late Sir Joseph Banks to the