I would read the pleasant wit or humor that so genially flows from those welcome pages of the Magazine. And having thus enjoyed myself so much, I deem it no more than fair that I should contribute my little 'might' to the entertainment of the numerous friends and patrons of the KNICKERBOCKER. I therefore send you a story that I can vouch for. 'My paternal ancestor is, and hath been for more than thirty years a physician of somewhat extensive practice. Upon one occasion he was called to see an Irishman, who at some 'entertainment' had had his head very badly smashed with a blow from an enormous cudgel. As my father was examining the 'wound,' the poor fellow broke out as follows: Och, Docthor! Docthor! I shall die! I shall die!' ''Oh! no, MICKEY,' said my father, 'you won't die; you'll get up and be all right yet.' Och! no Doctor, I shall die-I know I shall; and av I jist had the praste here to confiss me and administher the last sacramint, I would n't care a d-n.' ''Here,' says father, 'I could stand it no longer; I had to break out into a peal of laughter.' 'But my paper is fast flowing away. I had intended to send you still another, but I must wait. 'Accept my sincere wishes for the success and prosperity of the KNICKERBOCKER, and believe me Yours very truly, THE following tale hath high authority and is 'recorded:' WM. L. ENGLISH.' 'DR. PERLAM and a well and favorably known contributor to the KNICK' (ahem!) were boasting of what they had eaten. "I have eaten chamois,' quoth CONTRIB. "And I have eaten a coyote,' quoth the Doctor. "I once finished an alligator-steak,' was the rejoinder. "And I a piece of wolverine.' "I have eaten a porcupine.' "And I a fox-chop.' "And I gru-gru-grubs.' "And I once ate a monkey,' exclaimed the Doctor as a clincher. 'I told the story, my dear KNICK, to your other contributor, Miss pretty cry she exclaimed: The CANNIBAL!' 'Yours truly, 'P. S. You need n't send the Doctor his copy of KNICK for this month. 'P. P. S.: If he asks, do n't tell him. 'Wallabout, June 1.' With a very SETTLER. WILL our readers bear in mind our earnest request, that they will kindly say a good word for Old KNICK, and when they can, get us up a club? The Magazine hath a new proprietor, Mr. MORRIS PHILLIPS, for many years the 'active man' of the 'Home Journal;' one bearing the highest character for energy, probity and ability, and one who intendeth to make things fly gayly along the road to success. And our future shall show that all is well with us. Help us with a good word, reader — we would do as much for you; and for the present — vale! SERIES OF DICTIONARIES. THE STANDARD DICTIONARIES OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. I. The Royal Quarto Dictionary. II. The Universal and Critical Dictionary. III. The Academic Dictionary. IV. The Comprehensive Dictionary. V. The Elementary Dictionary. VI. The School Dictionary. WORCESTER'S QUARTO DICTIONARY contains 1854 pages, 1000 illustrations, 5000 words synonymized, and 20,000 new words. It is preferred by those who understand our language best-by such writers as President Felton, George P. Marsh, Edward Everett, Wendell Phillips, Charles Sumner, Wm. Cullen Bryant, Joseph Henry, Oliver W. Holmes, Prof. Longfellow, etc., etc. ** WORCESTER'S COMPREHENSIVE DICTIONARY. New electrotyped edition, revised and enlarged. It is better adapted as a text-book for High and Select Schools, and as a work of reference for families and the countinghouse, than any other Dictionary of the same size. Price, $1.12. WORCESTER'S SCHOOL DICTIONARY. New electrotyped edition, revised and enlarged. It contains all the words in the English language much used. It is printed in clear, distinct type, and is extensively used in schools. It is an admirable Pocket-Dictionary for travelers and soldiers. Price, 38 cents. SWAN, BREWER & TILESTON, 131 Washington Street, Boston, Mass. STERLING BOOKS PUBLISHED BY WALKER, WISE & CO., BOSTON, MASS. THE MASTER. A new story of uncommon sweetness and power. By Mrs. M. A. DENISON. 16mo. 75 cents. THE TRUE STORY OF THE BARONS OF THE SOUTH; or, The Rationale of the American Conflict. By Rev. E. W. REYNOLDS, author of 'Records of Bubbleton Parish.' With 'Introduction' by Rev. S. J. MAY. 12mo. 75 cents. TRACTS FOR PRIESTS AND PEOPLE. A series of Papers by HUGHES, author of "Tom Brown,' Prof. MAURICE, etc. Responsive to the 'Essays and Reviews.' 12mo. $1. 'A work of great power and learning.'—Independent. ESSAYS AND REVIEWS. By eminent English Churchmen. The great book of the age. New edition: edited by Rev. Dr. HEDGE. $1.25. PRAYERS. By THEODORE PARKER. With an admirable likeness of Mr. Parker, engraved on steel by SCHOFF. 16mo. Cloth, extra. 75 cents. REJECTED STONE; or, Insurrection vs. Resurrection in America. By a Native of Virginia. 12mo, cloth. 50 cents. Second series. An entirely new collection of Prayers, (150 in number,) by about thirty eminent clergymen, with appropriate selections. 12mo. 75 cents. Beveled boards, $1. JUST PUBLISHED BY CHARLES SCRIBNER, 124 Grand Street, New-York. STANLEY'S EASTERN CHURCH. LECTURES ON THE HISTORY OF THE EASTERN CHURCH, WITH AN INTRODUCTION ON THE STUDY OF ECCLESIASTICAL HISTORY. By A. P. STANLEY, D.D., author of 'Life of Dr. Arnold,' 'Sinai and Palestine,' etc. From the second revised London edition. Elegantly printed, at the Riverside Press, on laid, tinted paper, in one volume, octavo, with Map of the Eastern Churches, cloth, gilt. Price, $2.50. 'From beginning to end the volume is a series of magnificent pictures, perfectly drawn, perfectly colored, with the most artistic arrangement of light and shade, with the most finished grouping of figures, with a background and foreground proportioned, and over all an atmosphere as rich and warm as the atmosphere of the lands which the volume describes. In this picturesque splendor, Mr. Stanley's book is to other ecclesiastial histories what the great pictures of Church are to other pictures of scenery, incomparably alone; next, there is an impression of vitality in the book. It is all alive. The subjects are men, rather than ideas, or dogmas, or forms, and men who are not dead, but as living as the men whom we see and know. Then, again, there is the impression of breadth to this historical survey of a large and comprehensive conception of what Church history involves and what it ought to be. The work is refreshingly free from all religious cant and from all dogmatism. Its rhetoric is dignified, pure, and glowing-proper for the theme, but never sanctimonious.'-Christian Examiner. MULLER ON LANGUAGE. LECTURES ON THE SCIENCE OF LANGUAGE. By MAX MULLER, M.A. From the second revised London edition. One volume, large 12mo, printed at the Riverside Press, on laid, tinted paper. $1.50. 'Easily comprehensible and yet always pointing out the sources of fuller investigation. It is ample, both to satisfy the desire of those who wish to get the latest results of philosophy and to stimulate the curiosity of whoever wishes to go further and deeper. It is by far the best and clearest summing up of the present condition of the Science of Language that we have ever seen, while the liveliness of the style and the variety and freshness of illustration make it exceedingly interesting.-Atlantic Monthly. FOURTH EDITION, REVISED, OF MARSH'S (HON. G. P.) LECTURES ON THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. One volume, octavo. $8. Nearly Ready: AMERICA IN THE EYES OF EUROPE. By Count GASPARIN, author of 'Uprising of a Great People.' One volume, 12mo. $1.25. 'In this work the whole American question is discussed with the same clearness of manner, elegance of style, and justness of appreciation, which made his former work so popular.' Copies sent by mail, post paid, on receipt of price by the publisher. BOARDMAN, GRAY & CO.'S PIANO-FORTES, LIFE INSURANCE COMPANY, No. 98 BROADWAY, NEW-YORK. THIS COMPANY ISSUES POLICIES OF ALL KINDS UPON THE MOST GEO. T. ELLIOT, JR., M.D., Medical Examiner. W. A. BREWER, JR., Sec'ty. $1,000,000. 66 42,580 43. CASH CAPITAL, Assets, 1st Jan., 1860, $1,458,396 28. Liabilities, THIS COMPANY INSURES AGAINST LOSS AND DAMAGE BY FIRE, ON FAVORABLE TERMS. LOSSES EQUITABLY ADJUSTED AND PROMPTLY PAID. THE HOME JOURNAL FOR 1862. MORRIS AND WILLIS, EDITORS. A new series of this universally popular family newspaper will be commenced on the fourth day of January next-printed, as heretofore, on the finest of paper and with the best of type. Besides the incessant labors of the editois on the various departments of the paper, the beau tiful story, by an American Wife, called CHRISTINE, which has never been equalled by any similar publication, and the LOOKINGS-ON AT THE WAR, will be continued in the volume for 1862. In this series of sketches, Mr. Willis will continue to give such better studied and more deliberate views of the great movements as are impossible to the haste of writers for the daily papers: including, of course, sketches of the prominent men, and descriptions of the most stirring scenes at the seat of war. A number of other ATTRACTIVE AND RACY FEATURES will be introduced. Among these a new work, BY EDWARD S. GOULD, ESQ., ENTITLED, JOHN DOE AND RICHARD ROE; OR, EPISODES OF CITY LIFE. This work of Mr. Gould will be carried to the full proportion of a modern novel, and will, therefore, occupy our columns continuously for at least six months. Also, an original novel, entitled WHO IS THE HEIR? BY BARRY GRAY. The opening scenes of this brilliant story are laid on the coast of New-England, and amidst the breezy hills of old Berkshire. As the narrative progresses, the scene changes to a Southern city, and, finally, is transferred to New-York. The plot turns upon a point of inheritance, and the interest of the story commences with the first chapter, nor ceases until the end is attained. The time in which the events occur covers the past twenty-five years, and many of the characters introduced are drawn from life. Also, a new and beautiful ROMANCE OF TO-DAY. BY OLIVER BUNCE, author of "Life Before Him," "A Bachelor's Story," etc., etc. An American tale, delineating various phases of rural and town life, turning mainly upon some hitherto undepicted relations between love and genius, woman and ambition. It presents a three fold picture of the sex-the woman of the world, of genius, and of love-and contrasts with these the subtlety as well as the power and aspirations of man. And SOCIETY CORRESPONDENCE; or letters from the leaders of our fashionable circles in New-York and the other capitals, by which our readers will be unmistakably kept informed of the changes and progress of what is commonly understood by the "gay world"-a portion of our fellow-beings, about whom, there is no denying, we all feel a moderately news-loving curiosity. As we have taken some pains to arrange the resources for this new feature, we premonish our readers of its agreeableness with a considerably confident satisfaction. All the former peculiar features of the paper, which have given it a world-wide reput tion, will be continued, while several new ones will add a most spicy variety to its already diversified pages. TERMS.-For one copy, $2; for three copies, $5-or one copy for three years, $5; for a club of seven copies, $10; for a club of fifteen copies, $20, and at that rate for a larger club-always in advance. Address, MORRIS & WILLIS, Editors and Proprietors, 107 Fulton St., New-York |