them, and have their BILL TAXED- against the penalties of the law. It Quirk grunted with fright at the bare made old Mr Quirk's bald head even thought. Then there was a slapping flush all over whenever he thought of quiddam honorarium extra-undoubttheir bill being taxed, or contemplated edly for that they must, they feared, himself the inmate of a prison, (above trust to the honour and gratitude of all, at his advanced time of life,) with Titmouse; and a pretty taste of his mournful leisure to meditate upon the quality they had already experienced! misdeeds that had sent him thither, to Such a disposition as his to have to which profitable exercise the legislarely upon for the prompt settlement ture would have specially stimulated of a bill of thousands of pounds of him by a certain fine above mentioned. costs! and, besides that, to haveit to look As for Gammon, he knew there must to for the payment of at least some be a way of doing the thing somehow five thousand pounds douceur_nay, or another; for his friend Frankpledge and this was not all. Mr Quirk had, felt infinitely less difficulty in the way as well as Mr Gammon, cast many an than Mortmain, whom he considered a anxious eye on the following passages timid and old-fashioned practitioner. from a certain work entitled Black". The courts, he said, were now setting stone's Commentaries : their faces strongly against the docu “ MaintenANCE is an officious inter- trine of Maintenance, as being founded meddling in a suit that no way belongs to on a bygone state of things, (cessante one, by 'maintaining or assisting either ratione cessat et ipsa lex, was his faparty with money, or otherwise, to prose- vourite maxim.) There was no wrong cute or defend it. * * It is an offence without a remedy, he said ; and was against public justice, as it keeps alive there not a wrong in the case of a poor strife and contention, and perverts the man wrongfully deprived of his own? remedial process of the law into an engine And how could this be remedied, if the of oppression. * * The punishment by old law of Maintenance stood like a common-law is fine and imprisonment, bugbear in the way of humane and and by statute 32 Hen, VIII. c. 9, a spirited practitioners ? Was no one forfeiture of L.10! “ CHAMPERTY-(campi partitio)—is a to be able to take up the cause of the species of maintenance, and punished in oppressed, encouraged by the prospect the same manner; being a bargain with a of an ample recompense ? If it was plaintiff or defendant 'campum partiri,' said_let the claimant sue in forma pauto divide the land, or other matter sued peris : but then he must swear that he for, between them, if they prevail at law; is not worth five pounds; and a man whereupon the champertor is to carry on may not be able to take that oath, and the suit at his own expense. These yet be unequal to the commencement pests of civil society, that are perpetually of a suit requiring the outlay of thouendeavouring to disturb the repose of their sands. Moreover, a pretty prospect neighbours, and officiously interfering in it was for such a suitor, (in forma parother men's quarrels, even at the hazard peris,) if he should happen to be nonof their own fortunes, were severely suited to be "put to his election, animadverted on by the Roman law; and whether to be whipped or pay the they were punished by the forfeiture of costs.”+ Thus reasoned within hima third part of their goods, and perpetual self that astute person, Mr Frankinfamy. pledge ; and at length satisfied him. These are pleasant passages. self that he had framed an instrument Many were the conversations and which would “meet the case "_that consultations which the partners had o would hold water.” I am not very had with Messrs Mortmain and Frank- well versed in legal matters; but to pledge respectively, upon the inter- the best of my recollection it was esting question, whether there were something in the nature of a bond, any mode of at once securing them- conditioned to pay the sum of ten selves against the ingratitude of Tit- thousand pounds to Messrs Quirk, mouse, and protecting themselves Gammon, and Snap, within two months * * a * Blackstone's Commentaries, Vol. IV. pp. 134-5. of Blackstone, Vol. III. p. 400, where it is stated, however, that “that practice is now disused.” NO, CCLXXXIX, VOL. XLVI, of Titmouse's being put into possession note to Titmouse, (surely, under the of the rents and profits. The condi. circumstances, one of extraordinary tion of that bond was, as its framer temper and forbearance,) which had believed, drawn in a masterly manner; occasioned Titmouse the agonies which and his draft was lying before Messrs I have been attempting faintly to deQuirk, Gammon, and Snap, on the scribe ; and that Quirk, summoning Wednesday morning, (i. e. the day Snap into the room, had requested after Titmouse's interview with them,) him to give orders for denial to Titand had succeeded at length in exciting mouse if he should again make his the approbation of Mr Quirk himself; appearance at the office; which inwhen-whew !-down came a note juuction Snap forthwith delivered in from Mr Frankpledge, to the effect the clerk's room, in a tone and man. that,“ since preparing the draft bond," ner that were a very model of the im. he had had reason slightly to modify perative mood. his original opinion," owing to his A day or two afterwards, Mr Quirk, “ having lit upon a LATE CASE,” in (who was a man that stuck like a lim. which an instrument, precisely similar pet to a rock to any point which octo the one which he had prepared for curred to him,) in poring over that his admiring clients, had been held page in the fourth volume of Black“ totally ineilectual and void both at stone's Commentaries, where were to law and in equity." I say, Mr Frank, be found the passages which have been ledge's note was to that effect; for already quoted, (and which both Quirk su vigeniously had he framed it—so ef- and Gammon had long had off by fectually concealed his retreat beneath heart,) as he sate one day at dinner, at a little cloud of contradictory authori. home, whither he had taken the voties, like as the ink-fish, they say, lume in question, fancied he had at last eludeth its pursuers--that his clients hit upon a notable crotchet, which, cursed the law, not their draftsman: the more he thought of, the more he and, moreover, by prudently with- was struck with ; determining to pay holding the name of the “ late caso," a visit in the morning to Mr Morthe at all events, for a while, had pre- main. The spark of light that had vented their observing that it was twinkled till it kindled in the tinder of senior to some eight or ten cases which his mind, was struck by his hard head (indefatigable man!) he had culled for out of the following sentence of the them out of the legal garden, and text in question :arrayed on the back of his draft. “ A man may, however, maintain Slightly disconcerted were Messrs the suit of his near kinsman, servant, Quirk and Gammon, it may be be. or POOR NEIGHBOUR, out of charity and lieved, at this new view of the" result compassion, with impunity; otherwise, of the authorities." “ Mortmain is the punishment is,” &c. &c. always right!” said Quirk, looking Now, it seemed to Mr Quirk, that hard at Gammon; who observed sim. the words which I have placed in italply that one day Frankpledge would ics and small capitals, exactly met the be as old as Mortmain then was-by case of poor Tittlebat Titmouse. He which time (thought he) I also know stuck to that view of the case, till he where you will be, my old friend, if almost began to think that he really there's any truth in the Scriptures ! had a kind of a sort of a charity and In this pleasant frame of mind were compassion for poor Tittlebat-kept the partners, when the impudent ap- out of his rights tyrannized over by parition of Huckaback presented it- a vulgar draper in Oxford Street self, in the manner which has been where, too, no doubt, he was halfdescribed. Huckaback's commentary starved.--" It's a great blessing that upon the disgusting text of Titmouse one's got the means and the inclinaover-night, (as a lawyer would say, in tion, to save one's poor neighbours"analogy to a well-known term,“ Coke thought Quirk, as he slowly swallowupon Littleton,”) produced an effect ed another glass of the wine that makupon their minds which may be guessed eth glad the heart of man--and also at. It was while their minds were softens it;—for the more he drank, under these two soothing influences, (what else had heto enjoy?--for he had i. e. of the insolence of Huckaback long been a widower,) the more and and the vacillation of Frankpledge, more pitiful became his mood-the that Mr Gammon bad penned the more sensitive was he to compassion a bour.” a ate suggestions; and by the time that have Had Ever Since, it was all of he had finished the decanter, he was the Sperrits I Tooke wh made me Go actually in tears. These virtuous feel. On at such a Rate wh was always ings brought their own reward, too- (beg to Assure yr most respe house) for, from time to time, they conjured the Case Since my birth when I took 11р the faint image of a bond condi. Sperrits near so little Since I had the tioned for the payment of Ten Thou. Meazles when I was 3 Years Old as SAND POUNDS! I Well Recollect and hope it will be To change the metaphor a little Born in Mind what is Often Said, and by the time that old Quirk had reach- I'm Sure Iy'e read it Somewhere ed his office in the morning, the heated Else that People that Is Drunk Aliron had cooled ; if his heart had re- ways speaks the Direct Contrarywise tained any of the maudlin softness of of their True and Real Thoughts. the preceding evening, the following (wh am Certain never was any Thing pathetic letter from Titmouse might Truer in my case) so as I get the have made a very deep impression Money or What not, do whatever you upon it, and fixed him in the benevo- Like wh are quite welcome to Do if lent and disinterested mind of the old you please, and No questions Asked, lawyer, as indeed his “poor neigh, don't Mind saying by The Way It The following is an exact shall Be As Good as £200 note in copy of it. It had been written by The way of your Respe House if I Titmouse, all out of his own head; Get the Estate of wh am much in and with his own hand had he left it, Want of. Mr Gamon (wh is the most at a late hour on the night before. Upright gent that ever I came across “ To Messrs Querk, Gamon, and in all my Life) will tell you that I Snape. Was Quite Cut up when he came os Gents, After me in that kind Way and told “ Yr Esteem'd Favour his now be him Then how I loved yr Respecte fore Me, which must Say have Given House and would do all In My power me Much Concern, seeing I Thought it to Serve You, which seeif I Don't, I was was All Made up betwixt us That in Such a rage with that Fellow (He's was of Such an Unpleasant Nature only in a Situation in Tottenham Ct on Tuesday night (ultimo) wh I most Road) Huckaback which is his true humbly Own (and Acknowledge) was pame it was an oudacious thing, and all alone and intirely of My Own have given him such a Precious Good Fault, and Not in the Least Your's hiding last Night as you never saw which behaved to me, Must say, In when on his Bendid Knees He asked the most Respectful and superior the pardon of your Respectable House, manner that was possible to think sayg nothing Of Me wh wd not allow Of, for I truly Say I never was In because I said I would Not Forgive the Company of Such Imminent and Him because he had not injured me: Superior Gents before In my Life But you, wh I wonder at his Impuwh will take my Oath sincerely Of, dence in Calling on Professional Gents. Please to consider the Brandy Gents like you, if I get The Estate (wh do think was Uncommon Stif) shall never cease to Think well of such a flustrum As I Was In before, you and mean While how full of to, wh was Evident to All of Us Trouble I am Often Thinking Of there then Assemblid and very natral Death which is the End of Every like to be the Case Seeing I have Thing And then in that Case who nevir known what Peas of Mind was will the Property Go to Seeing I since I behaved in Such a Oudacious Have never a Brother or Sister Beway wh truly was the case I can't hind me. And Therefore Them That Deny to Such Gents as Yourselfs wd Get it I Feel Sure of wd Not do that were doing me such Good For- So Well by you (if You will Only tune And Kindness to me as it would believe Me) So Gents. This is all Be a Dreadful sin and shame (such as at present That I will Make so Bold Trust I can never be Guilty of) to to trouble you With About my Unbe (wh am not) and never Can Be happy Affairs Only to say That am insensible Of, Gents do Consider all used most Intolerably Bad now In this Favourably because of my humble The Shop quite Tyranicall And Mr Amends wh I here Make with the Tag-Rag as Set Them All Against greatest Trouble in my Mind that I Me and I shall Never Get Another a say." Situath for want of a Char” which he “ My dear sir !” exclaimed Gam- towards the House." “ He'll let the House tread on him till ing what I could not Eat,) he can tread on the House, I dare Your's most Respy TITTLEBAT TITmouse." « But you must own, Mr Gammon, P.S. Will Bring That young Man it shows we've licked him into shape with Tears In his Eyes to Beg yr par a bit-eh?" don Over again If You Like wh will “Oh, it's a little vile creeping reptile Solemnly Swear if Required That he now, and so it will be to the end of did It all of His own Head And that the chapter of our proceedings; and Have given It him For it in the Way when we've done every thing—really, That is Written Above And humbly Mr Quirk! if one were apt to lose Trust You Will make Me So happy one's temper, it would be to see such Once more by Writing To Me (if it a thing as that put into possession of is only a Line) To say You Have such a fortune." Thought No more of it. T. T. No 9 “ That may be, Mr Gammon; but Closet (t. Oxford Street. 14.7-182." I really-trust-I've-a higher feel. ing—to right the injured"- He This touching epistle, I was saying, could get no further. might have brought tears into Mr or Hem !” exclaimed Gammon. Quirk's eyes, if he had been used to The parties smiled at one another. the melting mood, which he was not; A touch, or an attempted touch at having never been seen to shed a tear disinterestedness!--and at Quirk's time but once- when five-sixths of his little of life! bill of costs (L.196, 15s. 4d.) were 66 But he's now in a humour for taxed off in an action on a Bill of Ex- training, at all events—isn't he?" change for L.20. As it was, he exclaimed Quirk—" we've something tweedled the letter about in his hands now to go to work upon-gradually;" for about five minutes, in a musing 66 Isn't that a leaf out of my book, mood, and then stepped with it into Mr Quirk ? isn't that exactly what”Mr Gammon's room. That gentle- “ Well, well—what does it signify?" man took the letter with an air of interrupted Quirk, rather petulantly curiosity, and read it over ; at every -" I've got a crotchet that'll do for sentence (if indeed a sentence there us, yet, about the matter of law, and was in it) bursting into soft laughter. make all right and tight,-so I'm Ha, ha, ha!” he laughed on con- going to Mortmain." cluding it—"a comical gentleman, Mr “ I've got a little idea of my own Titmouse, upon my honour !" of that sort, Mr Quirk,' said Gam“ Funny-isn't it rather?" inter- mon—" I've got an extract from Coposed Mr Quirk, standing with his Litt-, I can't imagine how either hands fumbling about in his breeches of them could have missed it, and, as pockets. Frankpledge dines with me to day, we « What a crawling despicable ras- shall talk it all over. But, by the cal !-ha, ha, ha!” way, Mr Quirk, I should say, with all “ Why-I don't quite say that, deference, that we'll take no more either,” said Quirk, doubtingly_“I notice of this fellow till we've got some -don't exactly look at it in that light." screw tight enough." a a • Why-all that may be very well ; and his friend Mr Hicklebagle, who, but you see, Gammon, the fellow they assure him, manifested a very seems the real heir, after all--and if warm interest on behalf of Mr T., he don't get it, no one can ; and if he and conducted himself with the don't-we don't! eh?” greatest propriety on the occasion of “ There's a very great deal of force his calling upon Messrs Q. G. and S. in that observation, Mr Quirk,” said They happened at that moment to be Gammon emphatically :-and, tolera- engaged in matters of the highest imbly well pleased with one another, they portance ; which will, they trust, exparted. If Quirk might be compared plain any appearance of abruptness to an old file, Gammon was the oil!- they might have exhibited towards so they got on, in the main, very well that gentleman. Perhaps Mr Tittogether. It hardly signifies what was mouse will be so obliging as to intithe result of their interviews with their mate as much to Mr Hickerbag: two conveyancers. They met in the There was an obvious reason for this morning on ordinary business ; and as polite allusion to Huckaback. Gameach made no allusions whatever to mon thought it very possible that that the “ crotchet” of the day before, it gentleman might be in Mr Titmouse's may be inferred that each had been confidence, and exercise a powerful satisfied by his conveyancer of having influence over him hereafter; and found a mare's nest. which influence Messrs Q. G. and S. “ I think, by the way,” said Mr might find it well worth their while to Gammon to Mr Quirk, before they secure beforehand. parted on the previous evening, “ it The moment that Titmouse, with may be as well, all things considered, breathless haste, had read over this to acknowledge the receipt of the fel. mollifying document, which being dilow's note-eh ?- Can't do any harm, rected to his lodgings correctly, he of you know, and civility costs nothing course did not obtain till about ten hem !" o'clock, he hastened to his friend “ The very thing I was thinking Huckaback. That gentleman (who of,” replied Quirk, as he always did seemed now virtually recognised by on hearing any suggestion from Mr Messrs Quirk, Gammon, and Snap Gammon. So by that night's post was as Titmouse's confidant) shook his dispatched (post-paid) the following head ominously, exclaiming—" Blarnote to Mr Titmouse : ney, blarney !" and a bitter sneer " Messrs Quirk, Gammon, and settled on his disagreeable features, Snap have the pleasure of acknow- till he had read down to the postscript; ledging the receipt of Mr Titmouse's the perusal of which effected a sudden polite letter of last night's date ; and change in his feelings. He declared, earnestly beg that he will not distress with a great oath, that Messrs Quirk, himself about the little incident that Gammon, and Snap, were “perfect occurred at their office on Tuesday gentlemen," and would “ do the right night, and which they assure him they thing, Titmouse might depend upon have quite forgotten. They made all it;" an assurance which greatly allowances, however their feelings cheered Titmouse, to whose keen dissuffered at the time. They beg Mr cernment it never once occurred to T. will give them credit for not losing refer Huckaback’s altered tone to the sight of his interests, to the best of right cause, viz., the lubricating quatheir ability, obstructed as they are, lity of the postscript; and since Tithowever, by numerous serious diffi- mouse did not allude to it, no more culties. If they should be in any de- did Mr Huckaback, although his own gree hereafter overcome, he may rest double misnomer stuck a little in his assured of their promptly communi. throat. So effectual, indeed, had been cating with him; and till then they that most skilful postscript upon the trust Mr T. will not inconvenience party whom it had been aimed at, that himself by calling on, or writing to he exerted himself unceasingly to rethem. vive Titmouse's confidence in Messrs “ Saffron Hill, 15th July, 182–. Quirk, Gammon, and Snap; and so “P.S.-Messrs Q. G. and S. regret far succeeded, that Titmouse returned to hear that any unpleasantness has to his lodgings at a late hour, a somearisen (Gammon could hardly write what happier, if not a wiser man than for laughing) between Mr Titmouse he had left them. By the time, how a |
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